"What the hell is going on?...."
Thats about the best way I can describe how im feeling right now. Just lost, plain and simple. Its not plain, or simple for that matter, but thats what it is. A sweeping feeling of being lost. But outside of the scope of my work life. I think its just that time of year. Im always stressed around Christmas time. This year is no exception. Going into debt is not my ideal christmas situation. Im back in the green again (so to speak) but its hard for me not to spend my money anyways. I felt like i was being dragged through the mud by life. Ive experienced that feeling a few times in my life and I can say its not the most pleasant feeling in the world. Speaking of that, i decided to text one of my exs today just to see how things were/what she was doing for the holidays. Bad idea, i was brought back to that not so pleasant time of my life. I dont really talk much about it because i try to forget it sometimes. Id been beaten and degraded out in BR and worked my ass off to never have it happen again. Enough of that rant though. Ive learned my lesson (no, i didnt) and ill steer clear of that. a week from today i go home. I have so many people to see and not enough time im afraid. Its a shame but i know who i "need" to see.
Its a Radiohead day. im enjoying this
Thats about the best way I can describe how im feeling right now. Just lost, plain and simple. Its not plain, or simple for that matter, but thats what it is. A sweeping feeling of being lost. But outside of the scope of my work life. I think its just that time of year. Im always stressed around Christmas time. This year is no exception. Going into debt is not my ideal christmas situation. Im back in the green again (so to speak) but its hard for me not to spend my money anyways. I felt like i was being dragged through the mud by life. Ive experienced that feeling a few times in my life and I can say its not the most pleasant feeling in the world. Speaking of that, i decided to text one of my exs today just to see how things were/what she was doing for the holidays. Bad idea, i was brought back to that not so pleasant time of my life. I dont really talk much about it because i try to forget it sometimes. Id been beaten and degraded out in BR and worked my ass off to never have it happen again. Enough of that rant though. Ive learned my lesson (no, i didnt) and ill steer clear of that. a week from today i go home. I have so many people to see and not enough time im afraid. Its a shame but i know who i "need" to see.
Its a Radiohead day. im enjoying this
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