Hibachi, Shots, and other shenanigans: A short story about me.

So, for my culinary school application, they ask you three questions that require an essay response. No less than 100 words, so on and so forth. I figure id write the first one here so you guys and gals can get some insight into the man behind the glasses.

#1: Please describe an experience where you discovered you had a passion for the food/service industy: 

           If I really try to sit and decipher the years of actual food industry experience and figure out when I actually fell in love with it, we'd be here forever. So instead, ill give you a snippet of one of my favorite times in the "industy". This story takes place in the quaint fishing village of Destin, Florida. Id been working at Harbor Docks for a few years now and really had a good handle on throwing down some sushi behind the sushi bar and the grand spectacle that is hibachi. Yoshie, my all knowing and wise head chef, had scheduled me to work hibachi during one of the spring break weeks. I cant remember exactly which one but southern accents we're thick in the air. Anyways, I had been slammed at the tables all night and finally got to clean up around 11:30pm. As per my usual nightly ritual, I had my headphones blaring some "motivational music"(Iggy and the Stooges I believe..) and was hard at work wrapping up what little I had left from service to be put into the walk-in cooler. Then, the kitchen door busts open. "Burch man, We got 11." proclaims the manager. My natural elation from shutting down turns into the special kind of rage that is reserved for people who come in after close. Ill spare you what I said to him, because it wasnt nice and I should have been fired for it, but just know that I ended up taking the table. I decided that this was going to be the quickest 11 top that Harbor Docks has ever seen and wanted to peek my head out at my impending victims. As my tall, red, chefs hat slides through the opening in the door I begin to hear giggles. A table full of energetic, loud, drunk college girls filled the table from side to side. I slide back in to the kitchen with a whole new purpose in life. "Time to shine, dude." I say to myself as I quickly unwrap everything. My manager was standing behind me with a huge grin and was about to give me the old "I told you so" when I blurted out I NEED A SHOT! He agreed and from my hidden kitchen stash, not product from the bar (Hi Charles!) we imbibed. Feeling loose and ready to blow these lovely ladies away I put the speaker on full throttle and started to pump the smooth, smooth sounds of Search and Destroy by the Stooges through my head. The order comes in. In total it was only about 5 dinners. Most of them where just there for the show and to drink. (which the most assuredly did..). I set the order up to perfection, practiced a few tricks and even tried to bust out a few new ones. Anticipation is building as I see the salads going out to the table, and the miso soups not far behind. "Show time" I tell myself quietly as I grab my trays of food, ready to go out and entertain. Through the door and on to glory....

      The table went off without a hitch. I nailed every trick, everything came out to perfection, and everyone was happy. Being a hibachi chef is almost like being a rockstar. You perform every night for crowds and your money is reliant on whether you went out there and nailed it, or totally bombed. People can and do idolize you to a certain extent just for the fact that you make fire out of an onion and throw around some knives. After that table, and the subsequent bar hoping there after, I got into a conversation with one of the girls about life in the service industry. She was wondering what I was going to do for a real job when I got older and it really got me to thinking. There was no other job than being some flavor of chef that really interested me. Its never been about money or security for me. Its keeping with a long line of brigands and scoundrels like myself that pass through those kitchen doors everyday, suit up, and put out the best food they possibly can just because they enjoy it. Do I want to make a ton of money in the future? Yes. Do I want people to know my name and the kick ass food I make? Yes. Will I be disappointed if none of that happens? No, I just love the industry that much to keep crawling back on my hands and knees to that kitchen in hopes that I can put out some of the tastiest food anyways has ever had.

     After writing this I think ill actually try to write something semi-serious for the application, but this is for everyone else. Hope you enjoy.  

No Salvation here

First of all, Happy New Years to all of you out in internet land. I hope that whatever resolution you made you stick with, atleast for a reasonable amount of time. I dont really do the whole "New Years Resolution" thing. Im constantly trying to better myself all year round so the changing of the year holds no weight. But, I do feel like 2014 is going to be one of my biggest years. I get out of the Navy, hopefully ill be starting back in college, and the prospects of being back in Florida are enough to excite anyone. One thing I have decided to do this year is be a more forgiving human person. I tend to shut people out if they've wronged me in any form or fashion. I used to not be like that, and I really hate that ive turned to such things. Anyways, Im still alive. People ask me if im still writing because I havent posted anything in a while. Answer: I am, I have a journal now. But I will share more on here. I want to chronicle my Navy experiences and just random things ive done in life. Most of you seem semi interested in my wild, jetset life. So I can only oblige by telling entertaining stories that are part fact, part fiction, and completely interesting. To me atleast.

Also, If you read this at any point, let me know what you want me to write about. A little direction never hurt anyone and I always love a challenge.

-Sean

You cant force them to like ya

On my lunch break today, I started to watch this interview Larry King did in 2010 for George Washington University. Magically this has inspired me. I had been feeling really down about my future choice in careers. Do I feel like I can get some big following by just writing or speaking? Yes. Do I still have a big fear of public speaking? Yes. Sometimes it holds me back. I just need to write. I need to do it. I stop sometimes because I feel like I have nothing to say. What I really should do is just chronicle some of the interesting things that have happened to me over the years. Im by no means a fresh spring chicken, but I feel like its hard to dig deep down and pull out a story that everyone will be interested in hearing. With my current goal of trying to go back to college well into play, I need to step up my game a little bit. People wont believe that Im this awesome writer/ orator just on hopes and wishes alone. I need to really get back on it.

Day 1: Here we go....

I wanna have control

Ive spent the lesser part of a year out to sea, deployed to the Persian Gulf. Day in and day out for almost 9 months I did the exact same thing everyday,  spending what precious little free time I had either a.) in my bed or b.) trying to do something fun to quell my boredom/loneliness. Now for the first few months, I wasn’t really lonely. Well, sort of. I was with this girl on board who I was totally smitten with (for no apparent reason) and tried to spend whatever time I could with her. Unfortunately for me, she didn’t really give a shit and we never really hung out, but that’s a different story for a different time. Anyways, in my time of reflection, Ive tried to sit here and piece together the broken puzzle that is my life. Am I happy doing this? Why did I bother to date that girl knowing she would just be a big fucking slut and move on? Should I really worry about what all these people on this little boat think about me and my life choices? All of it seems kind of silly. Little known fact, Im extremely self-conscience about a lot of things. What people think is one of them. Does that really stop me from doing anything? Yes, all the time, other days I just don’t care. Fear keeps people from doing a lot of things they should do in their lives. I don’t want to live like that anymore.

It led me to my next big realization: I *was* depressed. I tried to fill that void left by Elizabeth by doing just random shit around the boat or watching movies or whatever. But when you’re trapped in 505ft of metal having to see the same person who ripped out your heart with no care, it gets to you. Everytime we’d hit port id hit the bottle extra hard in hopes that, even if just for one night, I could forget about that devil woman and be somewhat normal. What brought me out of it? That’s for me to know, but just know that if I didn’t have such great friends then I would never have made it through.

In about two months ill be taking my first ever trip to New York City. The thought of traveling to such a large city gives me the chills sometimes. I wasn’t raised in a big city so trying to work my way through them is quite the task. Even in Tokyo, a city that I studied meticulously beforehand, was a bit much for me. Luckily for me I have my little duck and all her friends there. I told her I wanted to see *her* NYC, not the TV one. It cool to go and see all the touristy places, wait in line forever to stand at the top of the statue of liberty and all that, but its not what I want. I want to go to the local restaurants and go into a food coma. Things like that. Given the chance I want to live like a new Yorker, if only for a few days.

More to come. Stay tuned

Same glass curtain Im hiding behind.

Long time no see world.

Ive missed you.

A lot has happened in the months since ive left for deployment.

I wont spend this time to sit here and bad mouth someone that treated me
like dirt, cause wheres the fun in that?
This is going to be about my future, because I need to keep my head forward and focused
on something that wouldnt have even included that person anyways.

I had a dream the other night that I was laying down in the store room of some kitchen in NYC. All i could think about was "what the hell am i going to serve for dinner?"
Staring at the ceiling, it all began to come to me. Roast duck with a maple demi-glaze, red potatoes roasted in the juices from the duck. Some sort of asparagus, most likely broiled with olive oil and rosemary, served with a mini baggett. When i woke up from this dream I about lost my damn mind. I was so hungry (for actual food and..) to be back in the kitchen. Like a distant lover calling in the night, I feel like i need to answer this call.
It started to make me think. I really do fit this kind of loner, vagabond image of a chef. Not outwardly, but in personality and social deficiency.
My natural distrust of people seems to fade away when im behind a grill, or rolling sushi for that matter.
If I could be cooking right now I wouldnt be such the wreck that I am right now.
Or better yet, I would be inspired to create something so ridiculous that it would catch on and be a smash hit. (I.E. the "Willy" roll for those of you that ive made sushi for)
It also helps me work things out.
Which I need right now.
Stupid girls.


Anywho, ill keep this sweet and simple.
Yes, im fine.
I feel off the horse for a minute, but im good.

My 9/11 post....on the 12th.

11 years ago yesterday, The world changed.
I can remember it like it was yesterday. Like a lot of people in my school,
we watched the second plane hit on TV. I remember a girl in my chemistry class,
I wont name names, sitting behind me just screaming. Crying. Other
students around sitting with their heads in their hands. Another person
kept saying "a missile hit it, a missile hit it". At that moment, even after
seeing a commercial airliner, filled with people like you and I,
smash into the side of this building,  none of us could
rationalize it in our minds. Fire erupting from the otherside of the tower,
just kinda making you feel this strange emptiness inside.
By the time I really let it sink in that a plane had been used as a
weapon against us the first tower began to fall. All I can remember
is feeling sick to my stomach. Two sky scrapers, that before that day in time,
really meant nothing to me. But I saw it happening and it was almost
as if you could feel all of those people passing. Like when obi wan felt
Alderaan being destroyed in A New Hope, I felt the disturbance
in the force. The rest of the day was a blur. Though I do remember walking
through the mall like I usually do and almost every store was closed.
Such an erie feeling. Everything stopped that day. I remember coming home and
watching the news with my family. All of us piled on the bed, just watching.
They had a picture of the Empire State building on ABC and were talking,
rationalizing what had just happened to us.

Years pass by....

Im in the sushi bar at Harbor Docks, maybe a month out from joining the military. Its
lunch time and there a lady sitting at my bar talking to me about my life and
joining the armed forces and all that. The she asked me if I was joining because of 9/11.
I told her no, then she proceeded to tell me about what she was doing on that day.
And how she felt about it. Then she asked me what my first thought was when
all of this happened. I sat and thought about it for a second...
Then I realized it.
It was fear...
As Americans we're have the beautiful disposition to have two oceans to our east and west,
effectively "keeping out the bad guys".
That day brought out a weakness in us. And showed the world that no one  is immune to attack.
Not even our great country ('MERICA!)
Anyways, to keep this from getting out of hand and turning into a giant sob story,
I realized that Id be afraid all these years.
And that ignoring something so powerful in human history kept me
from really coming to terms with it.
Now, 11 years later, I really feel like I can put it behind me.


ps, with deployment coming up soon ill have one more post. It'll be a good one. Haiiiii

Im just saying it fine by meee

If youve never heard this song before than youre missing out....