You know what to do

There are a thousand words I could use to describe my New York trip, but I don't feel like any of them would do this city justice. Stepping off the airplane two days ago left me in a sort of jaded haze. Within the first hour we were sitting in a trendy little place for brunch. I had a local beer that was nothing short of spectacular and a sandwich that wasn't. ( but it was on the right track...) Then, we walked, rode the train, and had emerged in the hustle and bustle of New York City. The Big Apple. The center of the universe. Thousands of people were doing thousands of things as we walked towards where our friends were. Like Alanis morriset walking around name by herself, while the rest of the world continued on in her thank you video, the world just kinda slipped by as we strolled. It was beautiful. New York is a city of roughly 8.5 million people, all of whom were more than content to live there life while ignoring a tall, lanky ginger walking around with his best friend. It was refreshing. In New York, I'm no one. Which instantly makes me want to be someone. It's inspiration. Later we ate at a small little Thai place. ---small note--- 98% of the time I had no idea where the hell I was. So names will be missing of areas ---end note--- killer Thai food at some place that probably won't be open more than 5 years at most. Why? Because there's always the bigger fish out there. We met up with an old friend and his boyfriend and headed up to Roosevelt island. Right then, on the banks of the Hudson, I decided that yes, I was 100% moving to New York. We took the tramway (not gondola, thanks Melissa haha) back into the bustle of the city. More wandering. I told Melissa that I just liked to look up at the buildings and in the shops, just to live in that moment. That's how I am. That's who I am. It's moments like those that inspire me. We went to see a movie and then made it back to Hoboken after hours of sitting in traffic. The next morning, we did brunch. Bloody Mary's and mimosas at a restaurant next to the park. Then a Guinness at a little pub close to the train station. We made our way across town to a little ramen joint name momofuku. I'd only heard about this from a coworker, but fully trusted his judgement on excellent food. They did not disappoint. Full and happy, we wandered on down to a (one of many) consignment shops on our way. Everyone seemed to have some little gem in them. I practiced restraint and only bought a hat haha. We then made our way to Time Square and it was insane as I imagined. Thousands walking around, crowded in front of street performers and artists, snapping photos of buildings they don't know the name of, just because that's what everyone else was doing. New York is intoxicating in every sense of the word. I wanted to breath every single second of that beautiful city in. We finished the night we pizza and then hopped back on the train. Hoboken has a wonderful waterfront park that did it's best to provide a beautiful view while allow enough space to sprawl out in the grass and just be. Something we all need to do from time to time. I can only hope my next trip to that city is as inspiring as this last one. Positive energy is the name of the game right now. I need it. We all need it.

Self realization sponsored by: Black and Tans

Back a few blog posts ago, I wrote about the moment that I really knew that the service industry was for me. Ive had a change of heart. Before I couldnt recall an exact moment. Thats because it hadnt happened yet. Im not sure if its happened now, but ill share a little insight I received the other day. I started back at Harbor Docks over the summer, and pretty much 5 to 6 days a week, we go out there and make this delicious sushi for hundreds of people who a.) Know nothing about what we're serving or b.) Dont care. This frustrates me. I want people to appreciate what I do. What ive, and the rest of us for that matter, have worked years to hone and perfect our skill. For the first month I would sit and just wonder how these people could sit there and really not know or understand what they're eating. The history of something so wonderful, only few of us in this world are blessed to be able to know how to deliver. It really did bother me. I began to drink alot more. I started to question my life choices up to the point. Id hit a low point in a matter of a month. One day I was just sitting in the shower, wondering how bad my body would ache from the beating I was about to receive. From that day I started to search for my purpose in this business. Culinary business in general. Ive always wanted to be a writer so I though about hanging up the old chef coat and trading it in for a laptop. That brings us to now. Talking to one of my friends this evening, she was asking me about the past few days at work. I was telling her about some customers I had on Friday. They were from Atlanta or something and knew Yoshie pretty well. Naturally, she would wander in to make sure I was taking proper care, like a den mother watching over her cubs as the hunt. I did my best to treat them the same way i'd want to be treated at a sushi bar, with respect. And they reciprocated. One girl in the group asked for something she'd had at Nobu in -insert random big city-. 95% of the time this pisses me off. Today was the 5%. It was thin slices of Yellowtail (In the jack family. Light, oily, delicious) with thin slices of jalapenos, covered in ponzu sauce. Easy day. I made it. They loved it. They left our restaurant happy and full. At that moment, I had this overwhelming sense of pride im my work. That little reminder of why im doing this. Its what makes me want to continue on down the culinary path and ultimately towards chefdom. Anyways, that was just a little thought ive been keeping inside for a couple of days. This friday I head to New York City to visit my bestest of friends and check out my possible future stomping grounds. We'll see how it goes.....

Thats no way to go, Franco UnAmerican

My life is just insane sometimes. Ill skip going into detail, but its just nuts. June was pretty intense for me. I want to tell you that ive been totally happy and everything is peachy, but it hasnt been. I feel so much slower now (in terms of rolling sushi) than I was before. I know ive been out of it for a long time but I hold myself to a higher standard now that I did before. Its just overwhelming frustration. Its that feeling that I cant do it anymore. I know I can, but its still something thats in the back of my mind. But I do feel like ive been more creative since ive back. More willing to trying to try some silly shit to let people get the most bang for their buck. Ive been privately working on some new things myself so if I get enough good feedback ill let the world get some. Thats pretty much it for right now. im going to start taking more pictures so you guys can see some of the chaos that is my life. Oh and im going to New York next week so pictures will follow. Love you, mean it.

For 6 long years ive been a stranger

The farther down the road I get, the less sleep I seem to get. I feel like im most creative when im struggling to stay awake. Finer details might escape me in this time, but generally ideas flow a little bit better. Ive been back in Florida for a little over two weeks and im really starting to feel like coming back was a great idea. Ive been able to reconnect with people I have seen in years, meet brand new faces, and get back to rolling sushi. Its truly impossible to accurately explain everything im feeling right now. Its almost like im a character caught at the beginning of some wild adventure. Culinary school is approaching at a deafening pace and im trying to keep my head pointed in the right direction. I want to try and learn something new everyday that will benefit me here in the future. This go around, I need to have my head on straight and my ass out of the fire. That being said, ive been trying to jot down new things to make at the bar. Just new little things to throw out to the unsuspecting public in hopes that ill stumble on something to rival some of the monstrosities that people ask for. Pictures will eventually come, either on here or on my IG. But you will see them. Time to get out there are get me some.

A Wolf in chefs clothing

So much has happened since we've last spoke, let me fill you in

1. I turned 28: As my twenties are starting to come to a close, I made the decision to not really make a big deal out of birthdays anymore. As much as I love the attention (cause you know I do...) I can continue to pretend like they actually mean anything to me anymore. I blame Facebook for my slight interest in it. If not for constant reminders that "hey dude, youre getting older." id probably just let it slip by. And im trying to get better about remembering peoples birthday and other random events like that. I cant rely on technology as much as I have been if I want to feel remotely like a independent, sentient being.

2. My Navy career is in its last few days: May 24th, 2010, I joined the military for my own (private) reasons. Did I think the thing through when I did it? Not a chance, I do things on impulse, Im an Aries. But, I will never regret it. Fast forward almost 4 years later and im staring down the barrel of civilian life once again. Im older, grumpier, and about 100 times more determined to get what I want out of life. The Navy gave me something that I was sorely lacking beforehand...confidence. Now some of you might disagree and whatnot but regardless of what persona I put on 5/6/7 years ago, I was just a scared little sheep wandering around in a chefs coat. That person is long gone. Im a much more confident, self-aware person than I was. My head is high, my thoughts are clear, and I know what I want. The next few years will be interesting for all parties involved.

More has happened but I really feel like those are the most important things. Not everyone is in Pearl Harbor with me, seeing what im actually like now. Most of you just see whatever musings I put on Facebook or if I happen to snapchat you then you see whatever random things I send. (I apologize for drunk snapchatting random things....just kidding, im not) Long story short, drastic life changes are about to happen in a matter of days and those of you that personally get to experience the ride will be in for a treat. Im walking back into the kitchen as a wolf, and its going to be one hell of a ride. 

Lets get down to brass tacks

I was having conversation with someone tonight about what excites me most about the opposite sex, not to include the physical aspect of it. I sat and pondered over the herculean story book that is my love life. Then something popped into my head from oh so long ago. "Sean Burch, its not that youre interested in me, its that you love the chase. You love the feeling of being wanted until you actually get that person, then its gone." Unfortunately, such words have never rang more true. When I really sit and think about it, ive chased after many girls with pretty mediocre results. Its like I get up to that finish line and decide all the sudden that im done, take off my shoes and walk home. Then complain, to myself mind you, about not being able to let someone lock me down. Ive driven away plenty of good one due to this. Now as a small side note, I am picky as all hell. I dont want anyone to be confused about it. I have incredibly high standards now. Its an unfortunate bi-product of one too many bad breakups. And its not that I want to lower my standards, its just that I have a hard time compromising or letting things go. Its destined me to be forever alone in a silly kind of way. Ill work through it eventually, but I feel like the older I get, I wont have as many options left. We'll see though.
I didnt really feel like using spacing or anything like that tonight. I just wanted to ramble, which I love to do, and I know all of you love to listen right? yeaaaaaah. Anyways, this weekend is going to bring some fun things for me. Im writing a small novel about a sushi chef, kind of in the style of Get Jiro! and a sort of modern day samurai adventure. Lots of blood, guts and fish. Ill publish the first chapter tomorrow morning, and then put one out every few days. Itll keep me busy and I can expel all the creative juices that are swishing around in my brain as of late. Anywho, that you for reading as usual. I also have some more things I want to touch on tomorrow or the next day, so be prepared.
-SB

One thing I have never been good at is forgiveness. If I feel ive been wronged then it sticks with me for a really long time. Even after whatever it was ceases to bother me. I dont know why im like it. But I am. I still harbor a major grudge against a few people, years since out fallout may have taken place. I hate the fact that I do it but I really cant help it. Mainly I hold these grudges against women and I guess its because I dont want to feel that disappointment from them again. This is one of the only weaknesses that im willing to share with you all. Sometimes I feel like I have the metallic outer shell that filters out most bullshit the world throws out my way. On very rare instances, like once in a blue moon, I open up and allow myself to feel some kind of way about someone or something. Sometimes it doesnt work out. I understand this is how life is supposed to work, but in case you all havent noticed, im pretty much immune to all of that. (im not serious, calm down)  I just dont respond well to things sometimes so I just let it go. And I hate it. I push good people away. But thats life though I suppose.

Now on to something a little less touchy, feely. Ive been sleeping all the way through the night for the past week or so. Ive also been super tired during the day but thats expected. Anyways, in this sleepy time ive been dreaming like crazy. The I had an epiphany. I know how to market myself. Im still in the planning stages, but basically its going to be a mix of all of my favorite chefs (Marco Pierre White, Anthony Bourdain, Masaharu Morimoto, and so on.) with the charm and good looks of Leonardo DeCaprio, George Clooney, Mr Rogers, and Matthew David McConaughey. (thats right, I used his middle name. What of it?) A fearless leader of the land that is my kitchen. There are some finite details I need to develop within myself but im pretty much there. A General Douglas McAurthur of the culinary battlefield. Pretty wild huh? I just want to be larger than life to make up for the small problem of in fact not being large at all. Little details though huh?

Anyways, tomorrow brings more writing on hopefully a happier note. And being that tomorrow is Ric Flair Friday, ill most likely be delivering a handful of body chops to almost everyone I see. Good luck.

-SB